The last few days I have been really down in the dumps and uber crabby...I mean uber crabby. And poor Walleye has to take the brunt of that. I have no idea why I have been feeling so depressed and at times hopless. Monday was the worst - nothing could get me out of my funk. Nothing. I seriously wanted to just lay in bed and spend the evening crying. Then last night I was so insanely crabby I didn't want to sit by me. In fact I think my two cats caught wind of it as Walleye was gone most of the evening and they usually are all over me but last night they stayed clear. All evening. (That didn't help my crabby pants at all....I really wanted to just cuddle up with them.) I don't know what I was crabby at or why. Walleye even asked me at one point if I was mad at him. Which to be honest, made me even crabbier because not 30 minutes earlier I had told him I was super crabby and didn't know why. But thankfully I bit my tongue and just said that I wasn't mad at him, just crabby. Today is a bit better but I feel rather on edge. I don't know. Maybe it's the lack of hanky panky.
We are trying to make plans for the weekend and Walleye suggested we spend the day Saturday or Sunday 4-wheeling. I love 4-wheeling! I haven't gone since maybe once last summer. I was all for it and then it dawned on me....what if I am pregnant...can I go 4-wheeling? Is it safe? So I googled it and got conflicting answers. I think tomorrow I am going to call the Dr's office and see. I don't care if I feel like a fool or a complete idiot - not that they would ever make me feel like it was a dumb question.
I also noticed that these funks or moods I am in are having an impact on our weekend. Walleye has made all these suggestions for things to do but none of them sound overly appealing (except the 4-wheeling). What I really want to do is spend the weekend back in my hometown but since we have to go there next weekend for my cousin's wedding I can't see spending the money on gas heading there two weekends in a row. And I couldn't see asking Walleye to spend two weekends in a row at my parents!
Besides the mood swings I am survigin this 2ww rather well! I am still doing relatively good about not google-ing too much, not dwelling on what could, not getting my hopes up overly high. I am not over analyizing every little pain, twinge, feeling, mood swing, etc. Maybe it's these mood swings keeping me from doing all those things but I like to think that because I am still praying for patience so much that is why - maybe it is helping me to focus on that and trusting in His timing than the possibilities.
I am off for 5 glorious days in a row....with absolutely nothing planned - a few options are there but no plans set in stone! 5 days of not having to get up at 4 am for a dang suppository so I can get up at 5 am for work. 5 days of doing whatever comes to mind. 5 days of enjoying the wonderfully (and finally) warm MN summer weather. AAAHHHHH!!!!
Thursday, June 30, 2011
Monday, June 27, 2011
2WW (almost) half over...
Just about one week down of the agonizing two waiting weeks...and to be honest it hasn't really been all that bad! I think all my prayers for patience have been heard! I have been really good about not consulting Dr. Google on every little pain, twinge, feeling, etc. I have been good about not thinking too much into timing - if it was successful when/how we coudl tell everyone, what the due date would be, etc. I haven't been going nuts thinking about baby names and nursery colors and all that stuff. (Although at lunch today I ran to Target and I browsed past the cribs and such - but mainly because Walleye and I were talking about buying a new couch and love seat for the living room but then got on the subject of if we needed baby furniture soon how much would that be) - but I didn't stop and wonder and hope and kill myself with wishing like I would have last month. I did a quick walk by and went on with my shopping trip. Thank you God for giving me more patience this time around and thank you to anyone out there who may be praying for my patience.
Can I just express how much I absolutely HATE, HATE, HATE these darn progesterone suppositories?!?! Oh my they are a pain and a half. I hate having to set my alarm an hour early (4 am) so I can insert one and lay down for almost an hour. I hate having to insert one right before bed. And like last night I was up late so it wasn't until 11:30 the first one went in and only 4.5 short hours later another one did. Walleye's co-worker invited to their lake land for the 4th of July weekend and it sounds like a ton of fun however, I am not so sure about having to do suppositories while camping - it'd be different if they had a cabin that we were staying in. Plus Walleye, his coworker and his coworker's wife would all be able to have as many beers as their hearts desired and I wouldn't be able to have any...just in case. (I know when I do become pregnant it means way longer than 9 months without a beer but right now since there's a 50/50 chance that it would be worth the sacrafice it's not as easy). I have also noticed headaches, almost daily, since starting the progesterone - which I read was a potential side effect.
I also have been having bad side effects from the metformin. That is so strange to me because I haven't missed a single dose in weeks. Oh man do I hate the metformin side effects. Well I really only get one side effect but it's bad enough to be considered multiple ones. Well hopefully it works itself out soon. It might have something to do with the fact that I ate pretty bad this past weekend - lots of sugar, fat and calories...
My bloodtest is next Tuesday at 7:30 am so I should know the results by this time next Tuesday...one week and about one day to go....Praying I continue my current level of patience and not getting my hopes up too high.
Can I just express how much I absolutely HATE, HATE, HATE these darn progesterone suppositories?!?! Oh my they are a pain and a half. I hate having to set my alarm an hour early (4 am) so I can insert one and lay down for almost an hour. I hate having to insert one right before bed. And like last night I was up late so it wasn't until 11:30 the first one went in and only 4.5 short hours later another one did. Walleye's co-worker invited to their lake land for the 4th of July weekend and it sounds like a ton of fun however, I am not so sure about having to do suppositories while camping - it'd be different if they had a cabin that we were staying in. Plus Walleye, his coworker and his coworker's wife would all be able to have as many beers as their hearts desired and I wouldn't be able to have any...just in case. (I know when I do become pregnant it means way longer than 9 months without a beer but right now since there's a 50/50 chance that it would be worth the sacrafice it's not as easy). I have also noticed headaches, almost daily, since starting the progesterone - which I read was a potential side effect.
I also have been having bad side effects from the metformin. That is so strange to me because I haven't missed a single dose in weeks. Oh man do I hate the metformin side effects. Well I really only get one side effect but it's bad enough to be considered multiple ones. Well hopefully it works itself out soon. It might have something to do with the fact that I ate pretty bad this past weekend - lots of sugar, fat and calories...
My bloodtest is next Tuesday at 7:30 am so I should know the results by this time next Tuesday...one week and about one day to go....Praying I continue my current level of patience and not getting my hopes up too high.
Thursday, June 23, 2011
Thank You!
Thank you God! Thank you to all who have prayed! Duckie got his results yesterday from the MRI and CT and it appears he is cancer-free for now! There is a tiny spot on his liver but they said it could be scar tissue or if it is cancer his treatments should help so they aren't going to biopsy it yet. Mid July he starts immunotherapy, which will consist of 4 weeks of daily IV treatments and then after that three shots a week for up to a year. The Dr said he can't work duing those 4 weeks and that they are going to be pretty intense. We are all so relieved! When I talked to him last night he sounded really good. Still worried about his job but other than that he's doing pretty good.
My MIL seems to be doing better. We didn't go visit her last night but Walleye called his Dad for an update. My FIL said my MIL woke up yesterday much better - more aware, more with it and less wailing for water. We are hoping it was just her getting used to the meds and being back home.
I am so thankful for my brother's test results and my MIL apparent improvement. Thanks be to God! Thank you to all who have prayed.
My MIL seems to be doing better. We didn't go visit her last night but Walleye called his Dad for an update. My FIL said my MIL woke up yesterday much better - more aware, more with it and less wailing for water. We are hoping it was just her getting used to the meds and being back home.
I am so thankful for my brother's test results and my MIL apparent improvement. Thanks be to God! Thank you to all who have prayed.
Wednesday, June 22, 2011
and the 2WW begins
Here we are already...another 2WW! I am trying really hard to not drive myself crazy (and it's only been a few hours since the IUI).
Today's IUI went good. They are just so dang great at that RE's office! I can't say that enough! I have decided that I am going to write a letter to my last RE and my referring Dr - I feel very strongly that they all need to know how horrible of an experience we had with his office. What's sad is Dr. E was really nice and I really liked him.
I had a different nurse today so I asked her about the "quiet uterus" the nurse from yesterday told me and today's nurse said she never heard it but would talk with my Dr to make sure. Turns out of the 4 REs in that office my Dr is the only one who believes in the no hanky panky for two weeks after the IUI. So the nurse said in her honest opinion to do whatever we feel. Whew! That was going to make the 2WW seem even longer!
Duckie found out last night that the cancer wasn't in the lymph nodes they removed and will find out today what the MRI and CT scan show and what his treatment will be. I am seriously checking my phone and email every few minutes anxiously awaiting news. Praying it is good news. Duckie is getting a little nervous about his job...this week he will use up the last of his sick time and has only one day of vacation until September. And the owners of his company have let sick people go before so he is nervous they will do so to him. I pray they will be kind and understanding and work with him on his illness and need days off. He already has so much to worry about I wish he didn't even have to think about that.
My MIL doesn't seem to be doing so well now that she is at home. We went to visit her last night and when we walked in we could hear her wailing "somebody ppplleeeeaaassseeee help meeeee. i neeeeedddddd water." over and over again. Her aide was right there with her trying to get her to eat jello or drink pedialyte but that wasn't working. Her aide was so patient! I don't know how she did it. My MIL would drift in and out of sleep or consciousness. When she was awake it was like she wasn't really there there. She looked pale and her lips looked a little blue and seemed to be breathing hard so we talked the aide into putting her on oxygen (which she gets at night) and she seemed to do a little better. She didn't talk to Walleye when he talked to her and usually she has at least something to say. All she could say was how she needed help and water. It was so heartbreaking. We think it might be all the meds she is on and are praying that she isn't in any pain.
Today's IUI went good. They are just so dang great at that RE's office! I can't say that enough! I have decided that I am going to write a letter to my last RE and my referring Dr - I feel very strongly that they all need to know how horrible of an experience we had with his office. What's sad is Dr. E was really nice and I really liked him.
I had a different nurse today so I asked her about the "quiet uterus" the nurse from yesterday told me and today's nurse said she never heard it but would talk with my Dr to make sure. Turns out of the 4 REs in that office my Dr is the only one who believes in the no hanky panky for two weeks after the IUI. So the nurse said in her honest opinion to do whatever we feel. Whew! That was going to make the 2WW seem even longer!
Duckie found out last night that the cancer wasn't in the lymph nodes they removed and will find out today what the MRI and CT scan show and what his treatment will be. I am seriously checking my phone and email every few minutes anxiously awaiting news. Praying it is good news. Duckie is getting a little nervous about his job...this week he will use up the last of his sick time and has only one day of vacation until September. And the owners of his company have let sick people go before so he is nervous they will do so to him. I pray they will be kind and understanding and work with him on his illness and need days off. He already has so much to worry about I wish he didn't even have to think about that.
My MIL doesn't seem to be doing so well now that she is at home. We went to visit her last night and when we walked in we could hear her wailing "somebody ppplleeeeaaassseeee help meeeee. i neeeeedddddd water." over and over again. Her aide was right there with her trying to get her to eat jello or drink pedialyte but that wasn't working. Her aide was so patient! I don't know how she did it. My MIL would drift in and out of sleep or consciousness. When she was awake it was like she wasn't really there there. She looked pale and her lips looked a little blue and seemed to be breathing hard so we talked the aide into putting her on oxygen (which she gets at night) and she seemed to do a little better. She didn't talk to Walleye when he talked to her and usually she has at least something to say. All she could say was how she needed help and water. It was so heartbreaking. We think it might be all the meds she is on and are praying that she isn't in any pain.
Tuesday, June 21, 2011
Part 1 down, Part 2 tomorrow...
Part 1 of IUI #1 is in the books....
It all started last night after work. Walleye had to give me the novarel shot in backside. We watched a video on the RE's website to make sure we remembered everything they had told us last week then got the stuff together. I was really nervous when I saw that the needle the pharmacy gave us was just one and not two needles. The video showed you drew up the diluent with one needle and and used it to put it in the powder vial. Then you gently twist the vial back and forth to mix the diluent and powdered together, being sure to not shake it. Then you switch needles on the syringe, load it up and stick it in. Well the needle we got was just one piece and it was LONG! I had one set left from last July when we did our first shot and it hd two needles so I tried convincing Walleye we should use that but he said we should use the one the pharmacy gave us. Then he looked and said it was only a 1/2 longer than the one from last year so it would be fine. Easy for him to say he was the jabber and not the jabbee! He didn't have to have 2 1/5 inches of needle stuck in his behind. But I gave in and we went along our merry way. He got it mixed up, how I will never know because I was watching his every move like a hawk and freaking myself and him out. I don't know why I was so nervous...I wasn't nervous the last two times when the nurse did it. It's not like I don't trust Walleye but I just kept freaking myself out. Finally he said enough and enough and to let him just do it. So I am standing there with my left butt cheek hanging out, gripping the edge of the counter. He touches me and I jumped and got the nervous giggles. he starts counting, kinda slow, 1....2....and at 2 I said "just get it over with!" and while I was exclaiming it he jabbed me. I barely felt it. I think he got some staisfaction out ot it...maybe a little too much. :)
We had to be in Minneapolis at 8:15 for Walleye to do his part then had two hours to kill until my part. We went over to the hospital cafeteria for breakfast - surprisingly good and relatively cheap breakfast. Walked around a bit and then went back to the RE's office.
My appointment was at 10:15 at 10:20 the nurse from last Thursday came out and got me. She was so bubbly and excited. She asked if I was excited and I said I was a little nervous. She then told me it was a piece of cake, would take about 5 minutes and then 10 minutes of lying there and then I was free to go on with my day. She even gave me a little hug to reassure me that it was going to be relatively easy.
She brought me into a room with basically a counter, a little desk, three chairs and a table with the ever lovely stirrups. Went over the procedure details with me and left the room so I could get ready. She came back a few minutes later, went over the procedure again, had me verify that the vial had Walleye's and my names on it. Told me to lay back and within three minutes the whole thing was done. I was really nervous it was going to be painful. I had thoughts of the HSG and the pain I had from that. But it really wasn't so bad. The worst part was probably her putting the duckbill in. When she was done, she asked if I was alright or had any questions. Answered the few I had and went and got Walleye. (She did ask when we got into the room if I wanted Walleye in the room for it. Said he would stand by my head and hold my hand but I told her he didn't need to see all this.) She left, got Walleye and within 10 minutes we were on our way. She said I might have some cramping or little spotting but I haven't had either. She did mention that I was ovulating because I had some great mucus.
So now its back again tomorrow morning for round number 2. Hoping and praying it works! Thursday I start the progesterone suppositories twice a day for 12 days. Then on July 5th I go in for a blood serum pregnancy test.
Thank you all out there praying for us. They are so appreciated!
All in all it wasn't so bad. The worst part is she told me that Walleye and I can't have relations until the pregnancy test and if it is possible not until the OB ultra sound...really?!?!? Can this be true? She said they want to keep the uterus as quiet as possible. Please tell me this isn't true....that's a really long time!!! Granted it will all be worth it if we have a positive outcome but seriously, two weeks minimal, maybe longer?!?!? AAACCCKKK!!!
It all started last night after work. Walleye had to give me the novarel shot in backside. We watched a video on the RE's website to make sure we remembered everything they had told us last week then got the stuff together. I was really nervous when I saw that the needle the pharmacy gave us was just one and not two needles. The video showed you drew up the diluent with one needle and and used it to put it in the powder vial. Then you gently twist the vial back and forth to mix the diluent and powdered together, being sure to not shake it. Then you switch needles on the syringe, load it up and stick it in. Well the needle we got was just one piece and it was LONG! I had one set left from last July when we did our first shot and it hd two needles so I tried convincing Walleye we should use that but he said we should use the one the pharmacy gave us. Then he looked and said it was only a 1/2 longer than the one from last year so it would be fine. Easy for him to say he was the jabber and not the jabbee! He didn't have to have 2 1/5 inches of needle stuck in his behind. But I gave in and we went along our merry way. He got it mixed up, how I will never know because I was watching his every move like a hawk and freaking myself and him out. I don't know why I was so nervous...I wasn't nervous the last two times when the nurse did it. It's not like I don't trust Walleye but I just kept freaking myself out. Finally he said enough and enough and to let him just do it. So I am standing there with my left butt cheek hanging out, gripping the edge of the counter. He touches me and I jumped and got the nervous giggles. he starts counting, kinda slow, 1....2....and at 2 I said "just get it over with!" and while I was exclaiming it he jabbed me. I barely felt it. I think he got some staisfaction out ot it...maybe a little too much. :)
We had to be in Minneapolis at 8:15 for Walleye to do his part then had two hours to kill until my part. We went over to the hospital cafeteria for breakfast - surprisingly good and relatively cheap breakfast. Walked around a bit and then went back to the RE's office.
My appointment was at 10:15 at 10:20 the nurse from last Thursday came out and got me. She was so bubbly and excited. She asked if I was excited and I said I was a little nervous. She then told me it was a piece of cake, would take about 5 minutes and then 10 minutes of lying there and then I was free to go on with my day. She even gave me a little hug to reassure me that it was going to be relatively easy.
She brought me into a room with basically a counter, a little desk, three chairs and a table with the ever lovely stirrups. Went over the procedure details with me and left the room so I could get ready. She came back a few minutes later, went over the procedure again, had me verify that the vial had Walleye's and my names on it. Told me to lay back and within three minutes the whole thing was done. I was really nervous it was going to be painful. I had thoughts of the HSG and the pain I had from that. But it really wasn't so bad. The worst part was probably her putting the duckbill in. When she was done, she asked if I was alright or had any questions. Answered the few I had and went and got Walleye. (She did ask when we got into the room if I wanted Walleye in the room for it. Said he would stand by my head and hold my hand but I told her he didn't need to see all this.) She left, got Walleye and within 10 minutes we were on our way. She said I might have some cramping or little spotting but I haven't had either. She did mention that I was ovulating because I had some great mucus.
So now its back again tomorrow morning for round number 2. Hoping and praying it works! Thursday I start the progesterone suppositories twice a day for 12 days. Then on July 5th I go in for a blood serum pregnancy test.
Thank you all out there praying for us. They are so appreciated!
All in all it wasn't so bad. The worst part is she told me that Walleye and I can't have relations until the pregnancy test and if it is possible not until the OB ultra sound...really?!?!? Can this be true? She said they want to keep the uterus as quiet as possible. Please tell me this isn't true....that's a really long time!!! Granted it will all be worth it if we have a positive outcome but seriously, two weeks minimal, maybe longer?!?!? AAACCCKKK!!!
Monday, June 20, 2011
Amazing!
The new RE office is Amazing! Simply amazing! It is such a completely different experience between this RE and Dr. E.
I went in for another u/s this morning. I got there really early (because you never know what traffic will be like on the interstate) - like 50 minutes early so I parked in the ramp, locked my car doors and snoozed with the seat back for about 30 minutes. Then went up and they got me in within 5 minutes. They got me in early again! Everyone was extremely friendly, as they always are. The u/s tech was fantastic! She showed me the screen and explained everything she was seeing. Maybe this is the norm but that's the first time ANY of the u/s techs any of the places I have gone to have done that. My lining is at an 8 - which they said anything over 7 is great! I have one follie on my left side at a 21 and then a few others that are just under 18. The u/s tech left and the nurse stayed and went over the game plan with me. She was so patient and answered all my questions and made sure I completely understood everything and that we had covered all the bases. She even told me about restaraunts within walking distance for tomorrow! After I had a bloodtest and then scheduled the next two days.
We are doing our first IUI cycle tomorrow. I am nervous, scared a little but mainly excited. I have just felt compelled to go the IUI route and am thankful we are finally able to! So tonight Walleye gets to stick me in the butt - which last time he had to stick me was in the upper thigh so I think this will be better as I won't be able to watch him. Then tomorrow morning Walleye and I have to be at the REs office at 8:15. he does his thing, then we have to wait two hours while they prepare the sample - washing and counting and all that jazz. Then at 10:15 I have the insemination, which I was told will take about 5 minutes and then 10 minutes of rest and then we are free to go. Then Wednesday morning we have to be there for Walleye's part at 7:45 and mine at 9:45. Then it's 12 days of progesterone suppositories twice a day (YUCK!) and on 7/5 I go back for a blood pregnancy test. holy cow! All of a sudden it seems to be happening so fast. I can't believe the 2ww is almost upon us again!
This cycle is completely different...instead of just praying that it works, which I have been some, but my prayers have mainly been for patience to accept that this will happen on His time. Patience to accept His plan, whatever it may be. And that I don't drive myself complete bonkers during the 2ww!
Duckie update...not much of one. Apparently he was in quite a bit of pain on Saturday but yesterday was better. He's getting his days and nights mixed up though as the first night (Friday) he wasn't able to sleep much at all so then finally slept during the day on Saturday and then Saturday night couldn't sleep well, etc, etc. Wednesday cannot come soon enough for any of us, especially him.
MIL update...they moved her out of the mini ICU area on Saturday afternoon, took her off oxygen and talks of her coming home today were had. Then yesterday when we got there she was back on oxygen - in fact her oxygen levels were in the low 80s. Which is really bad. She wasn't eating or drinking. She is on a purreed diet and can only have thickened liquids but she is being stubborn and doesn't want that. She also kept saying she was hot and Walleye felt her forehead and she felt as though she might have a fever. They are doing respiratory therapy on her every 3 to 4 hours and have been monitoring her. She refused the peg line (I thought it was a pick line but now they keep saying peg line) for at least 6 weeks. Not sure why she said 6 weeks but it was her choice. Hoping for a positive update today.
I went in for another u/s this morning. I got there really early (because you never know what traffic will be like on the interstate) - like 50 minutes early so I parked in the ramp, locked my car doors and snoozed with the seat back for about 30 minutes. Then went up and they got me in within 5 minutes. They got me in early again! Everyone was extremely friendly, as they always are. The u/s tech was fantastic! She showed me the screen and explained everything she was seeing. Maybe this is the norm but that's the first time ANY of the u/s techs any of the places I have gone to have done that. My lining is at an 8 - which they said anything over 7 is great! I have one follie on my left side at a 21 and then a few others that are just under 18. The u/s tech left and the nurse stayed and went over the game plan with me. She was so patient and answered all my questions and made sure I completely understood everything and that we had covered all the bases. She even told me about restaraunts within walking distance for tomorrow! After I had a bloodtest and then scheduled the next two days.
We are doing our first IUI cycle tomorrow. I am nervous, scared a little but mainly excited. I have just felt compelled to go the IUI route and am thankful we are finally able to! So tonight Walleye gets to stick me in the butt - which last time he had to stick me was in the upper thigh so I think this will be better as I won't be able to watch him. Then tomorrow morning Walleye and I have to be at the REs office at 8:15. he does his thing, then we have to wait two hours while they prepare the sample - washing and counting and all that jazz. Then at 10:15 I have the insemination, which I was told will take about 5 minutes and then 10 minutes of rest and then we are free to go. Then Wednesday morning we have to be there for Walleye's part at 7:45 and mine at 9:45. Then it's 12 days of progesterone suppositories twice a day (YUCK!) and on 7/5 I go back for a blood pregnancy test. holy cow! All of a sudden it seems to be happening so fast. I can't believe the 2ww is almost upon us again!
This cycle is completely different...instead of just praying that it works, which I have been some, but my prayers have mainly been for patience to accept that this will happen on His time. Patience to accept His plan, whatever it may be. And that I don't drive myself complete bonkers during the 2ww!
Duckie update...not much of one. Apparently he was in quite a bit of pain on Saturday but yesterday was better. He's getting his days and nights mixed up though as the first night (Friday) he wasn't able to sleep much at all so then finally slept during the day on Saturday and then Saturday night couldn't sleep well, etc, etc. Wednesday cannot come soon enough for any of us, especially him.
MIL update...they moved her out of the mini ICU area on Saturday afternoon, took her off oxygen and talks of her coming home today were had. Then yesterday when we got there she was back on oxygen - in fact her oxygen levels were in the low 80s. Which is really bad. She wasn't eating or drinking. She is on a purreed diet and can only have thickened liquids but she is being stubborn and doesn't want that. She also kept saying she was hot and Walleye felt her forehead and she felt as though she might have a fever. They are doing respiratory therapy on her every 3 to 4 hours and have been monitoring her. She refused the peg line (I thought it was a pick line but now they keep saying peg line) for at least 6 weeks. Not sure why she said 6 weeks but it was her choice. Hoping for a positive update today.
Saturday, June 18, 2011
oh the highs and lows of femara
You'd think by now I'd be used to the extreme highs and lows I get when on Femara but nope it surprises me every time.
I had another u/s this morning at 8:45 and not knowing what traffic would be like I left at 6:50 a.m. and got there by 8:05! But they were amazing and got me in withing 5 minutes of getting there. I was in and out well before my scheduled appointment time! The nurse today was just as amazing as the one on Thursday! I love that they have a nurse in the room with me during my u/s. I have numerous at 10, a 12 and 14 and a 16. My lining is only at around a 4 so not exactly ideal. I am going in for another u/s on Monday morning at 8:15 Depending upon how things look we will either go TIC or IUI. We only get 6 IUI cycles per confirmed pregnancy paid for by insurance so if everything doesn't look optimal (i.e. my lining not thick enough) will do the shot and TIC. The Nurse and Dr were completely on board with that. I just can't believe how easy they are to work with!
Anyways, back to the highs and lows of femara. So during my hour and fifteen minute drive down to the REs office I had a lot of time to think. I got to thinking about Duckie and praying for him and started tearing up and before I knew it I had tears streaming down my face, praying "Please don't let him die". I finally composed myself, got through my appointment and was back on the road and got to thinking about if it actually worked and we did have a baby if my MIL and Mom would be around to meet him or her. I again started crying. Get my composure back and am about two miles from home, at a stoplight and saw a text from Walleye saying he was leaving for fishing. I got a little mad because he wasn't supposed to go fishing until tonight and we were going to go visit his Mom in the hospital and then spend the day shopping for a new couch and pots & pans. Then I got home and we were talking and I just started crying. He felt bad and was going to cancel his fishing trip but I wouldn't let him - we can do that all tomorrow. And now I am just kind of depressed.... just want to put on my pjs, grab my cats and jump into bed and watch lifetime movies all day. What a change from yesterday...yesterday nothing could get me down! I think I was still flying high from the meeting with the doctor the day prior. Poor Walleye - he has to bear the brunt of these extreme mood swings.
I had another u/s this morning at 8:45 and not knowing what traffic would be like I left at 6:50 a.m. and got there by 8:05! But they were amazing and got me in withing 5 minutes of getting there. I was in and out well before my scheduled appointment time! The nurse today was just as amazing as the one on Thursday! I love that they have a nurse in the room with me during my u/s. I have numerous at 10, a 12 and 14 and a 16. My lining is only at around a 4 so not exactly ideal. I am going in for another u/s on Monday morning at 8:15 Depending upon how things look we will either go TIC or IUI. We only get 6 IUI cycles per confirmed pregnancy paid for by insurance so if everything doesn't look optimal (i.e. my lining not thick enough) will do the shot and TIC. The Nurse and Dr were completely on board with that. I just can't believe how easy they are to work with!
Anyways, back to the highs and lows of femara. So during my hour and fifteen minute drive down to the REs office I had a lot of time to think. I got to thinking about Duckie and praying for him and started tearing up and before I knew it I had tears streaming down my face, praying "Please don't let him die". I finally composed myself, got through my appointment and was back on the road and got to thinking about if it actually worked and we did have a baby if my MIL and Mom would be around to meet him or her. I again started crying. Get my composure back and am about two miles from home, at a stoplight and saw a text from Walleye saying he was leaving for fishing. I got a little mad because he wasn't supposed to go fishing until tonight and we were going to go visit his Mom in the hospital and then spend the day shopping for a new couch and pots & pans. Then I got home and we were talking and I just started crying. He felt bad and was going to cancel his fishing trip but I wouldn't let him - we can do that all tomorrow. And now I am just kind of depressed.... just want to put on my pjs, grab my cats and jump into bed and watch lifetime movies all day. What a change from yesterday...yesterday nothing could get me down! I think I was still flying high from the meeting with the doctor the day prior. Poor Walleye - he has to bear the brunt of these extreme mood swings.
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