Amazing!

This morning was AMAZING!  No other word seems to quite describe it better.  AMAZING!

We had our NT Scan today.  I know it is really meant for those who want to know their chances of Downs Syndrome but because I wasn't feeling very pregnant and am a complete worry wart I chose to do it for the additional ultrasound.  It won't matter to us one bit what the results of this scan are - it's our child, nothing will change that.

I am so glad we chose to do the scan.  We got to see our baby, who I think given his/her due date's proximity to St. Patrick's Day, I am going to refer to as Lucky from now on.  Lucky actually looked like a human baby and was moving around a ton.  When the u/s tech tried to measure the nasal bone Lucky had his/her hands covering his/her face...I think Lucky's shy like his/her Mom!  :)

We got see and hear the heartbeat!  172!  It was so awesome. 

I knew I shouldn't wear eye make up to the exam but I did and by the end Walleye was wiping my tears of joy away for me (and keeping me from looking like I was wearing hooker make up).  

I am so thankful we had the opportunity to see our little Lucky today!  It has put my mind at ease.  Praise God for this wonderful miracle!

We told my family this weekend.  When my Mom opened her gift she crumpled the shirt to her chest and started to cry and then finally showed it to the rest of us and my Dad started to cry.  I, of course, was crying as was my sister.  Duckie didn't say much.  Walleye just grinned from ear to ear.  I am a little bummed about Duckie's lack of reaction but everyone else was so over the moon happy!  It was great.  I am so glad we I chose to tell my family that way! 

After lunch the men left for a Twins game and us girls went to visit my Grandma and spend the day together.  I could tell my Mom was having a hard time keeping the secret from my Grandma but we asked everyone to keep quiet until we can tell our close friends at our BBQ in two weeks.  Besides we had to wait since July 5, so two weeks is NOTHING!  :)

The rest of the weekend you could just tell everyone was on a baby high! 

Yesterday I went to my cousin's baby shower and my one cousin who is due ten days after me was there.  She's the one who announced at 5 1/2 weeks, it was hard not to say anything to her and my other cousins/relatives but the day wasn't about either of us - it was about my cousin, his wife and their miracle due on 11/11/11. 

After the shower we decided to tell K (my cousin/sister/best friend) as I just couldn't wait any longer and she truly is like a sister to me.  It was killing me that I hadn't been able to tell her.  She cried and said she just knew it.  She had a feeling I was lying to her and that she just knew it.  She completely understood why I didn't tell her and forgave me for my "little white lie".  Although I still feel horrible having lied to her. 

I am so thankful He has blessed us with this miracle. 

Exciting Weekend Ahead!

I am so ready for a weekend.  Last week was my first 5 day work week since the end of May and it was hard.  Coming in Friday was quite adjustment.

Thankfully this is just a 4 day work week - well somewhat.  Tomorrow I am volunteering to work our university booth at the State Fair so it's work related but not really work.  I am working with one of my best friends, who happens to be an alumna so it worked out well.  After we are going to go out for supper and beers - or she thinks we'll be having beers...can't wait to see her reaction when I order a ROOTbeer instead of a Nordeast!

Saturday we head down to my parents bright an early to get there in time for 11 am lunch.  My Mom got my Dad tickets to the Twins game tomorrow and Duckie and Walleye are going with for a boys day.  That leaves my sister, mom and niece-dog to hang for a girls day!  But the exciting part is we are FINALLY telling my parents!  I can't wait for my Mom to open her present (the Grandma shirt). 

Sunday I get to see my cousin/sister/best friend and FINALLY tell her too!  i just hope she isn't too mad at me for lying to her for the past number of weeks.  Then I have a baby shower for my cousin's wife Sunday afternoon.  Will be fun to see my cousins and aunts.  Just wish I could tell them our news but 1. I wouldn't want to take any attention away from the Momma-to-be and 2. we are waiting to tell extended family until after our wedding party BBQ in September.  (Boy is it going to be hard for my Mom I bet from now until mid-September!) 

All this family time is just what I need!  I can't even wait!  2 more sleeps! 

Do you think these are signs?

So my FIL was scheduled to go on yet another 3 week vacation starting this past Sunday or Monday.  He was taking the bike and meeting a cousin of his in Nebraska and then they were going to head to the Carolinas and Louisiana and such. 

Well last week one of my MILs aids quit so there were open shifts that the family is responsible for covering but they are during the day when Walleye and I are working and we need to save our vacation for the big event in March.  Not sure why my BIL and Free Loader couldn't cover them but I'm not even going to get into that!  So, if you were my FIL wouldn't you take this as a sign from God that maybe you shouldn't go on this second multi-week trip in less than a month?  Nope, not him! 

So then wouldn't you take the possibility of Category 3 Hurricane hitting the exact coast you are headed for around the exact time you'll get there as another sign that God is telling you, once again, to postpone this trip? 

Am I the only one seeing the signs here?!?! 

On a baby note...I have been looking at bedding for months and months!  Way before we were pregnant.  I fell in love with this set the minute I set eyes on it. 

Isn't it adorable? I mean really, it's just simply adorable!  And works for a girl or boy. 

For the longest time we weren't talking much about baby things or looking for baby things in fear we'd jinx it.  And even though I am still not 100% fear free and worry more than I should that I'm going to miscarry or have a missed miscarriage I have been beginning to look more and more for baby things and day dream. (Monday's u/s can't come soon enough!)

So I printed the photo off and showed it to Walleye last night.  I was so excited about it and you know what his reaction was..."It looks expensive."  WHAT?!??!  That's all you have to say?  That's the first thing that pops into your mind? 

I immediately got mad and started crying and told him he took all the fun out of everything.  (He didn't want to spend the money on the Grandma t-shirts.  Why spend the money when we can just tell them and they'll be just as happy?!?!)  I told him how I felt it was so perfect and that I just adored it.  He got defensive and said that's just how he is and I should know that.  I mean I know he's cheap (except when it comes to his hobbies) but come on.  This is our kid!  Not that we have to over spend or get the most expensive stuff but we should at least have fun with it.  Enjoy it. So frustrating. 

Spilled the beans

Another quick weekend this past weekend.  Walleye went 4wheeling with some buddies so I planned on vegging Friday night, shopping with sis Saturday and cleaning the spare room on Sunday...two out of the three things got done!

Saturday I met my sister at IKEA and was hoping to come across the crib section, start looking at cribs and see if she got the picture but I didn't see cribs per se - I saw toddler beds but no cribs.  There was a ton of people there so I decided it was a sign not to tell her.  It just didn't feel right.  So we finished the top floor and decided to grab meatballs (which was probably 75% of the reason we went there in the first place).  So we sat down and my sister starts off a converstaion very nervous and timid and telling me I don't have to talk about it if I don't want to but she was wondering how the IF battle was going.  I just stared at her and tried not to cry but the look on my face must have told her there was not good news ahead because she started to stammer and say we didn't need to talk about it.  I finally was able to speak and barely got out "we're pregnant" before the tears started flowing.  She was so flippin' excited!  It was so dang cute.  She didnt' know whether to get up and hug me or not (since there were so many people around) but finally we got up and huged and cried and laughed.  The whole rest of lunch you could tell she was just on cloud 9.  Actually the whole rest of the day!  We finished our lunch, tackled the lower level and then walked across to the Mall of America.  While at the MOA we proceeded to walk around every stinking floor - and one more than once!  She said at one point that afternoon that she had been praying for us but that she was also praying for something good to happen to our family as we had been having some bad luck lately (Duckie, my Mom, Walleye's Mom, etc) and that this is just what we needed.

I tried to remind her that we are still very cautious and explained that with my lack of symptoms I am pretty nervous and scared.    But it was so dang cute how excited she was!  I can't wait to tell my parents next weekend! 

Sunday I didn't get the spare room cleaned...at all!  I didn't even step foot in it!  I went to 10 am Mass, ran to a large box retailer and the grocery store.  2:15 I got home, put away my purchases, cleaned the kitchen and had enough.  Sat my rear on the couch and didn't get up until Walleye came home!  Oh well we've still got 19 days until the BBQ to get the two spare rooms ready.  :)

I have been doing relatively well on the not worrying - most days.  Some days it's harder than others.  Like yesterday - I didn't feel one bit pregnant.  not one bit.  And it freaked me out.  So much so that I barely got any sleep last night.  Every litle thought would explode in my head into something a million times worse.  I am so thankful we have our u/s in less than a week!  (Well a week from this morning).  I just hope I can keep my worries at bay another 7 days....

Super Fast Weekend!

Wow is it really Monday already?  My last three day weekend flew by.

It started with dinner at my MIL's for her birthday on Thursday night.  Both Walleye and I were rather cool to my FIL - I took my cues from Walleye since it's his Dad.  And I think my FIL realizes that things haven't been too good and that maybe he wasn't acting as he should be during this entire vacation ordeal.  He was overly nice to us, thanked us for everything we did and then offered to take us out for dinner as the least he could do to show his gratitude.  Walleye told him we'd see about dinner some night.

For the most part my MIL's birthday dinner went well...until we were just sitting down to eat our DQ cake and in walks Free Loader with a card and flowers and her 4 kids in tow.  She made a huge ordeal about telling my MIL that she brought flowers and wishing her a happy birthday.  Then tried to make small talk with us while her kids ran screaming and yelling through out the house.  I know this wasn't a very Christian thing to do but I didn't even acknowledge her - not once.  The only time Walleye did was when she asked a question and I had just put a bite of cake in my mouth (thankfully!).  I wasn't sure if she caught on to the cold shoulder or not.  But my BIL did call Walleye the next day to see what we were up to for the weekend - which is rather unusual. 

My FIL claims he knew nothing about the birthday party that was going on on Saturday and that my MIL's friend planned the whole thing.  I don't know if I believe him or not but at this point it doesn't matter any more.  We ended up not going - neither of us wanted to have any contact with my BIL and Free Loader.  And we were actually really busy on Saturday cleaning the house and garage to start getting ready for the upcoming BBQ. 

My FIL leaves on the 17th for another 2 - 3 week motorcycle trip.  Yes, you read that correctly...he is once again leaving for 2 - 3 weeks after having just got back.  He asked Free Loader to watch my MIL from 2:30 - 4:30 on the days an aid won't be there during that time.  Which Free Loader said she would except for when she has a job interview and then if she gets the job.

I about dropped my piece of ice cream cake when I heard Free Loader was actually interviewing for a job.  I didn't think that woman would ever work.  Good for her.  Glad she is actually going to be responsible and not live off the child and state support she receives or my BIL for that matter.  I just never thought I'd see the day.  Although I am hesitant that should she get the job that she'll actually be able to hold onto it.  It's at the prison as a guard but that means some weekend and holiday work - especially as a newbie.  And considering she quit her PT job at the gas station because they required her to work Thanksgiving.  She thought because she had 4 kids she shouldn't have to work holidays. I pray she gets the job and is smart enough to accept it and all that comes along with it. 

Besides the little bit of in-law drama on Thursday night the weekend was great.  Went by super fast.  Walleye and I spent a lot of time together.  Besides starting to get things ready for the BBQ we also were totally and completely lazy and it was heaven!

Well I think that's about enough about my in-laws and Free Loader.  In pregnancy news there's really nothing new.  I still don't feel very pregnant, but I have been very good about leaving it up to Him and not worrying too much about it.  Every once in a while I get a little worried and nervous or an overwhelming feeling that I'll have a missed miscarriage but I usually stop myself, say a quick prayer and go on with my day.  I am excited for my u/s in two weeks!  It will be nice to see the little one again.  And I really can't wait until the weekend of the 27-28 to tell my family! 

And lastly, thank you for the comments on my last post Morgan and Awaiting.  I appreciate the comments and prayers!

So over my FIL and BIL!

I am shaking mad at my FIL, BIL and Free Loader right now!  (Not that Free Loader is technically an in-law.)  I mean my hands are literally shaking I am so mad!

It is my MIL's birthday today.  When the others were on vacay we noticed on my MIL's calendar "Birthday Party" written on this Saturday's date.  I was surprised to see they had actually planned something ahead of time and even more surprised we hadn't heard anything about it.  I asked my MIL about it and both her and her aid were positive it was for one of Free Loaders kids and not my MIL. 

So Walleye and I talked about having a family birthday party for my MIL on Sunday and invite one of her good friends over but then my FIL and BIL were so horrible to Walleye we decided we would just do a nice, simple dinner on her birthday to celebrate.

So we have plans to bring chicken wraps out there for dinner tonight - one of her faves and super easy to make.  Well Walleye called his Dad to see if he had picked up a small DQ cake or any cake at all and his Dad said no and that he wasn't going to because they were having a birthday party for her on Saturday.

WHAT?!?!   Nice of them to invite us or even let us know what they were planning. 

Walleye thinks that maybe they are combining Free Loaders kid's birthday party with my MIL but even so it's still his Mom and he should have been invited.  And not to mention maybe my MIL isn't ready to handle all the commotion of a kid's birthday party with the added guests of Free Loader's family.

I just don't get it.  What did Walleye (or I) ever do to deserve this kind of treatment.  It breaks my heart because family is so important to me.  I couldn't imagine not wanting to talk to my brother or sister. 

Walleye said maybe they are mad about us not inviting them over for supper tonight but my BIL works 4 pm - midnight so it wouldn't work for him anyways and it was obvious this was planned weeks ago before they left on vacay.

Walleye isn't sure we will go on Saturday and to be honest it might be best if we stay away because I don't think I can keep my mouth shut and my MIL (nor the kid) doesn't deserve to have her birthday celebration ruined with a family feud.

It is going to be really hard to be nice and friendly to my FIL as I am still holding hurt feelings for his actions and words and the whole vacation ordeal.  At least we won't have to see Free Loader or my BIL tonight. 

T-shirts and Baby Ramblings

I had my first OB visit - well first visit with my OB and to be honest I don't like her.  She wasn't very friendly.  I felt like she rushed through my appointment - I was told when I checked in she had two patients in labor and could get called to the hospital so maybe that's why.  I felt like she didn't really listen to my questions and made me feel like I was asking dumb questions.  She didn't even introduce herself when she walked in the room.  I don't know if I am being overly picky or overly spoiled at the place in the cities or what.  My next appointment with her is September 20 and if I have the same feelings I think I will then think about switching OBs. 

We weren't able to find the heartbeat on the doppler but she assured me I was too early (8w6d).  She also assured me that my lack of and disappearing of symptoms can be completely normal for all people and that unless I was experiencing bleeding or major cramps things are fine. 

I have decided to let go of all my worries and trust in God that this will be a healthy pregnancy leading to a healthy baby in March 2012.  Besides all the stress from worrying can't be good for the baby (or me)!  I prayed last night for Him to help me let go of the worries and I feel as though I have a huge weight lifted off my shoulders.  I am so thankful for that.

I ordered t-shirts for my Mom and MIL today!  They are so stinking cute!  I got grey one's with Grandma Est. 2012 on the front in blue and pink lettering.  My Mom's birthday is August 29th so on the 28th we will give it to her as a gift!  My MIL's birthday is tomorrow but that's a little too early to tell her yet so will give it to her closer to 12 weeks.  I can't wait to give it to them!  I know my MIL won't be able to see the t-shirt but I thought then every time the aid dresses her in it they'll tell her they're putting her Grandma shirt on and she'd get a kick out of that. 

My Mom recently retired so I was going to put "I start my new job as GRANDMA in March 2012" on the shirt but decided I liked the less is more approach.  I am going to have one made that says "Future VIKINGS fan" with an arrow pointing down and "Kick Off: 03.14.11" on the back for me to wear to the VIKINGS game on 10.09.11 and then Walleye and I can get our pic taken at the game and we can use it as our Christmas card.  

Walleye thinks I added the "Est. 2012" on the shirts I ordered as a dig against Free Loader's kids...which isn't true, I actually wasn't thinking about them when I came up with this and I wanted somehow to put a date on the shirt.  But now that he's pointed it out I hate to admit it but I am pleasantly pleased that it will help reiterate that Free Loader's kids ARE NOT my MIL's grandchildren.  Is that horrible? 

I made the shirt(s) at customizedgirl dot com. And found a $5 off coupon for it at retailmenot dot com. 

As mentioned above it is my MIL's birthday tomorrow so Walleye and I are bringing supper out to her.  We were going to suggest a birthday dinner on Sunday but one of Free Loader's kids has a birthday party on Saturday and to be completely honest we have no desire to see my BIL or Free Loader after the horrible way they treated Walleye on their trip.  In fact I am having a hard time with the fact that I have to see my FIL tomorrow night at dinner.  I am still so angry with him about this entire vacation!  Did I mention that they were supposed to come back on Friday so we could leave town on Saturday morning but then they said they'd be back sometime Saturday which turned into actually getting back MONDAY!  I know, I know, i need to let it go.